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  • Barbara

Kindness is not a virtue but a natural byproduct of being well.

It’s very tempting to box ourselves in categories of good and bad. As if being loving, kind and generous would be a measure of character and of our moral compass - or at least something that we can and should control. Be nice, be good, be better. This view makes these qualities personal and ‘up to you’ which creates unnecessary pressure inside.

What I have noticed instead is that these higher qualities are not in anyone’s control; we don’t DO them.. they happen. They find their way into our lives as natural byproducts of feeling whole and undivided inside, they are a symptom of healing and wellbeing. Like a butterfly finding your shoulder spontaneously, outside of your effort or control, so does kindness land on you and your actions when you are unburdened inside. So rather than trying to be good or better, perhaps instead it is more fruitful to focus on laying down inner weight and burdens from the past. It’s very possible and very interesting to find out who you become when you’re treading lighter 🍃




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